March 20th Everything I do I do it for YOU

5 years ago, March 20th 2006  I landed in Detriot Airport bursting with excitement and eager to share my new found love for Haiti. I walked through the airport laughing and joking with my new friends when I spotted my step mom, Anita.

My heart sunk. She wasn’t due to pick me up- I was set to spent the night at a friends to be picked up the following day.

As she got close my stomach was in knots- she gave me this look that I will never forget.

My one question- “ He is still alive right?”

Anita- “I’m sorry Britt”

2 hours before I landed, my Grampa, my mentor, my protector and my best friend died after battling cancer for months.

I didn’t get to say goodbye.

The weeks that followed were probably the most difficult to date. Not only was I grieving the loss but I felt GUILTY. Guilty for leaving when I knew he wasn’t  doing well, guilty for not being home- to say goodbye, to support him in his last days, to support my family.

My Grampa wanted me to go to Haiti, he knew I had a passion for social justice and a gift to share. He knew that this was what I was suppose to be doing, and he is still supporting me and pushing to dream, to achieve and to be the best that I can be.

This year, as I prepared for my return to Haiti but ultimately my trip to the DR I was nervous. I haven’t travelled on that day since 2006. And this time I was leaving behind my Step Dad who is currently battling cancer.

Would history repeat itself?

[Thankfully it didn’t my Step Dad is still fighting the battle with a strong spirit and great courage. Prayers are appreciated.]

But March 20th 2011 I was sitting on a beach in the Dominican reflecting on the last 5 years.

I have achieved so many milestones I wished I was able to share with my Grampa- high school graduation, university graduation, multiple volunteer trips, a career, awards and recognitions.

My Grampa has missed the success of my fathers business, the success of his youngest son Josh, the birth of Dawson my littlest brother, the growth of my little brother Dennis. He has missed the strength of my Gramma and the unwavering support of Anita. But somehow I know he is looking down on us with a huge gapped smile [he was missing teeth] and a feeling of pride.

5 years later that strong, hard edged- soft centred man continues to guide me and support me in all that I do. And I still miss him greatly.

Everything I do I do it for you.